Happy New Year and welcome to my stop on the Winter Spanks Blog Hop :).
I have a real life spanking tale for you today about a mistake I made when I was trying (honestly I was!) to help a good friend of mine. I was visiting said friend, who we shall call Chris (not his real name) to protect the sadistic, vicious… that is, I mean to say *coughs* lovely and kind friend of mine ;). I was in his kitchen on a very cold January day and noticed that the coffee pot was empty and the machine was still plugged in so, being a helpful sort, I pressed the switch on the wall to turn it off.
So far, so good, except the following day I got a text from him informing me that he’d spent most of the day taking the central heating boiler to pieces as he’d thought it wasn’t working, only to find that ‘somebody’ had turned off the switch for it on the wall. Oops! My bad.
Of course, I apologised. A lot! But also couldn’t help finding it rather amusing. Mistake number two.
My next mistake was to decide it would be really funny to write a poem for him about the incident. So I did. See below:
The Iceman Cometh…
“I was only trying to help,” said honey.
It really wasn’t meant to be funny.
When I turned off the switch,
I didn’t know it would be such a hitch,
I was just trying to save you some money.”
He growled “You turned off the heat!
The cat and I have such cold feet.”
“I think you should chill out,”
Said honey, her lip beginning to pout.
He glared, “I suggest you beat a hasty retreat,
Before I mete the worst spanking in creation
So you can’t sit down upon your own seat.
This is hereby official Domly notification
That I am taking immediate action to provoke a reaction
On your bottom.
That you’re going to be admonished,
I really don’t think you can be astonished.
You need a controlled, methodical lesson
Delivered with calculation, conviction and precision
Upon convection, conduction and radiation in relation
To the consequences
Of heat deprivation in extreme frost.
This you will receive, to your cost,
Until you learn that the fifth law of thermodynamics,
And the final, immutable and invariable law of universal physics,
No matter in which ‘brane, population or dimension, is:
‘Do not let honey press any buttons or switches, please.'”
If she ever does it again,
He’ll probably manage to count to ten,
But no doubt she will be told
That revenge is a dish best served cold.
I sent it off to him by email, laughing my ass off as I pressed send. And his reply?
“Occasionally one has to tell subbies to stop digging.
More rarely they are advised to put down the shovel.
Once or twice they have been advised not to use a JCB.
The advice this time runs along the lines of: “Send back the dragline excavator, and pay off the teams of navvies, since the present hole is more of a meteorite crater”.
I do suspect that a glowing object will be found in it’s depths though.”
Oops again! Being a Domly sort, of course, the next time I saw him, I did indeed get ‘the worst spanking in creation’. Well it certainly felt like it at the time ;).
So, after that little tale, what can you win, and what do you need to do? Click here to go to the main Winter Spanks Blog Hop page to see what the grand prizes are.
I’m also giving away an ebook copy of Coming, Ready or Not! Three Tales of Tease and Denial, and all you have to do is comment below and don’t forget to leave me your email address so I can send you the ebook if you win :).
Rules for the Blog Hop:
Follow the links to read the blogs–comment on the blog to prove you were there (or answer the participant’s specific question, if they have one). COPY AND PASTE COMMENTS WILL BE DISQUALIFIED! Each comment earns you one entry for the grand prize. You must provide your email address for your entry to count. Individual pages may also have their own form of entry (Rafflecopter, etc) for additional chances to win prizes. Enjoy all the free stories, posts, & fun!
Winners will be announced on Monday 6th January.
Apparently the Link List isn’t working at the mo, so here’s a full list of the participants so you can carry on hopping :):